"I need a break..."

My older sister is supposed to be "living with" me, but I haven't seen her since the end of August (which is probably why I started this blog and never posted again...it's hard to track her dumbshit when she's not here, though I could do a dumbshit's greatest hits), because she was "spending a few nights" with her boyfriend (it's the middle of Septmeber now).  Since she was living with me, I was going to have her watch my dog when I went on vacation in a few weeks (basically just make sure she had food and let her out a few times).  Since I hadn't heard from her, I made other arrangements.  No big deal.  I had planned to pay her for it anyway.

I heard from her today that she wants to know when I'm leaving so she can watch my dog.  What? I told her I had already made other plans, and I wasn't trying to be mean about it, but she was obviously busy with work, the boyfriend, etc (though I really am pissed she hasn't come by/called/gotten her stuff/etc).

"But I want to watch [dog].  I was looking forward to it.  I already told [boyfriend] I was going to have to leave for a few weeks."
"I haven't seen you in weeks.  You can't even make time to come over here and get your stuff.  You expect me to just assume you're going to be here to watch the dog?  Don't worry about it.  I found someone responsible."
"I'm getting tired of [boyfriend].  I need a break.  I was looking forward to coming over there for a couple of weeks.  I already told him I was going to."

I laughed at that.Seriously?  Is that what you say to convince someone you're responsible?

"Cops always lie."

My sister asked if I could help her pay $100 fine she has.  She said it was for expired tags, and she had talked to them.  I told her I would and she gave me the url of the place to pay.  Turns out it was for a DWI and the fine was actually over $300.  I asked how she didn't know she had a DWI when she feigned ignorance.  Then she accused the cops of making up the DWI charge.

"Haven't you ever seen cop shows?  Cops always lie!  Why would you believe them?"
"In cop shows, isn't it the criminal who normally lies?"
"Your basing your entire concept of crime off TV?  TV isn't real."

[sigh]